If you frequently down a pint of ice cream in one sitting after a stressful conversation, eat a whole bag of chocolate when you’re feeling hormonal, or if the first thing you reach for is a bag of potato chips when you get home after a bad day at work, then you may be an emotional eater. Although women seem to typically experience it more than men, emotional eating can become an issue for anyone, including children and teens.
While almost everyone eats for comfort at some point in their lives (I know I have), it’s when it becomes a habit that real problems can develop. The binge eating most people do when eating emotionally can cause blood sugar swings, systemic inflammation, and weight gain, all of which can lead to more serious chronic diseases like diabetes. The food also acts as a barrier, preventing people from dealing with underlying anxiety, anger, depression, and sadness. Much like the feeling alcoholics experience, food numbs emotional pain.
How can you determine if emotional eating has become a problem for you? Here are a few questions to ask yourself next time you feel the urge coming on:
- Have you just had a very emotional or difficult conversation with someone? Or is there an ongoing stressful event happening in your life, such as problems at work, the death of a loved one, or difficulty in a relationship? If any of these instances are occurring, you may be especially vulnerable to emotional eating.
- What time of day is it? If you find yourself hungry mid-afternoon after lunch, or late at night after you’ve had dinner, it could be emotional eating rearing it’s head.
- How long ago did you actually eat something? Has it been several hours, or less than one or two? Try to notice and keep track of your habits and cravings and when they occur.
- Do you try to be mindful when you’re eating or are you distracted by the t.v., email or surfing the Internet? If you’re not paying attention, it’s much easier to consume more than your body really needs.
If, after monitoring your behavior for awhile, you suspect that emotional eating has become an issue, here are some ways to help you break the pattern:
Learn to stay present

Practice eating minus distractions. Sit down at a table and eat without any reading material, smartphones, computer or t.v., and encourage anyone else you are eating with to do so, too. You may even want to say a silent ‘thank you’ to the universe for the chance to sit down and be unplugged from everything. Use the time to converse with a co-worker, friend or family member, but pay the most attention to chewing your food slowly and enjoying the experience of eating.
Hunger litmus test
Next time you’re craving something- be it salty chips, ice cream, chocolate or your mom’s homemade bread- imagine eating an apple, salad, or some celery sticks instead: Does that seem too much or too filling? If so, you’re probably not really hungry. And if you’re not hungry, then what is it you really want? (Hint: that’s the emotional component you have to uncover, and moves us on to tip number three…)
Deal with the underlying issue(s)

What is it that you feel is missing in your life? What are you craving? If you’re getting a healthy dose of the things in life that feed you emotionally and spiritually-like loving relationships, a career you enjoy, an outlet for creative expression, or some physical activity- then you might not be so inclined to crave foods that make you feel good. It’s important to consider where you may need to make changes to feel happier and more satisfied and fulfilled in life.
If you find you need a break from work, try taking a walk, even if it’s a short one. If you realize you’re feeling lonely, reach out to a friend or loved one instead, and get some verbal comfort. If it’s your job that’s dragging you down but you can’t really quit, consider how you might make it more bearable by structuring non-food rewards for yourself, like when you get your work done faster. Create a plan or system for yourself to respond to crises in a healthier way, instead of eating emotionally.
Seek outside support
If the problem of emotional eating seems too big for you to handle alone or you’ve tried some of the ideas above and they aren’t working, don’t hesitate to reach out to a community support group. There are many women and men who share the same difficulty, and finding others to connect with can give a much-needed boost to tackling an often overwhelming problem. Individual counseling can also help if there are deep-seated issues you can’t deal with alone. Again, don’t hesitate to seek help.
It’s important to note that, even with the best of help, emotional eating habits won’t just go away overnight-they took time to develop, and they will take time to change. But learning ways to intervene for yourself in the future can make all the difference. Geneen Roth, author of Women, Food and God, and an emotional eating expert says, “If you pay attention to when you are hungry and what your body wants, you end the obsession, because obsession and awareness cannot coexist.” Learning what’s behind your emotional eating is key to increasing awareness and creating conditions for healthy change to happen, now and in the future.