BY NIKKI WILLIAMS
The family home is getting to be too much
for Mom and Dad. Or perhaps Mom has fallen
and the doctor doesn’t want her living in a
house with stairs. Should Dad still be driving
with his declining vision?
Members of the 50-plus age group now find
themselves facing these and other aging parent
dilemmas. What are the choices for aging
parents? How can their adult children help?
Ideally, grown children have spent quality
time with aging parents long before issues
that go with their advancing age begin. They
have talked openly together about finances
and plans and wishes for the future. When
this has not happened, solutions take more
time and are often subject to more resistance
from parents.
With the Internet, information about senior
housing and care options for the aging adult
is now a lot easier to find. There are also
many professional care managers who guide
people through the whole process, whether
it be things like assessing an elder’s needs,
finding help so that an aging person can stay
at home, or downsizing the number of belongings
and settling him or her comfortably in a
new environment.
Family physicians can make recommendations,
or the local county Office for the Aging.
Some of the best advice can come from people
who have already had to deal with aging parent
issues. Their experiences and lessons learned
can be a valuable resource.
Senior living arrangements generally break
down into three categories: independent living,
assisted living, and long-term (or skilled) care.
There are many varieties of independent
housing for seniors: large and small, for-profit
and not-for-profit, subsidized and market rate,
no services to full services.
Upscale independent living has cottages
or buildings with luxury apartments, gyms,
activities and travel, housekeeping services,
and restaurants. This more exclusive and expensive
housing sometimes requires ownership
of the living quarters or the payment of entry
fees that may be returned in full or in part if
the senior leaves for any reason.
More modest buildings offer fewer amenities
at a lower cost, but can still be a great
source of community living providing informal
support systems, some services, activities, and
meal plans. This housing generally requires
just a lease and the payment of rent each
month.
Subsidized independent housing for lower income
seniors requires that seniors not
exceed income limits. They must fully disclose
financial information.
Rents in such apartments are usually 30
percent of the senior’s income and the rental
subsidy usually comes from the U.S. Department
of Housing and Urban Development
(HUD). Applicants are generally screened
for such things as citizenship status, credit
worthiness, and criminal history.
Most independent housing for seniors allows
residents to have help in the apartment,
so a parent aging in place can hired an aide
if that becomes necessary. Seniors can stay in
independent housing as long as they can solve
problems and act safely.
Assisted living is the right place for elders
who cannot take proper care of themselves
when living independently, but who do not yet
require skilled care given in nursing homes.
Assisted living generally provides private
rooms or suites, three meals a day, laundry and
housekeeping services, medication management,
24-hour supervision, or a combination of
these services for a monthly fee. Many assisted
living facilities specialize in memory care for
elders with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms
of dementia (confusion and forgetfulness).
New York state offers minimal financial
assistance opportunities for this level of care
making it difficult to obtain for low income
seniors.
Seniors who need daily attention from a
nurse or other medical professional require
what is called long term or skilled care. This
was, and sometimes still is called a nursing
home.
A medical assessment covering the senior’s
ability to perform their own personal care and
that assesses their decision making skills, level
of forgetfulness or confusion, and medical
needs is required before admission.
Today’s skilled care is not what older seniors remember from years ago. Residents in long
term care can now enjoy the less institutional
setting of modern buildings with homey rooms,
and stimulating activities, as well as less
restrictive visiting hours and more flexibility
with meal times and choices.
States have programs to help pay for longterm
care for those who cannot afford it. The
counsel of a well-regarded elder law attorney
years before skilled care is on the horizon is a
must for anyone with assets.
Williams is a certified aging services professional
Photo Courtesy The Wesley Community
at The Wesley Community.